Beware the wolf in sheep’s clothing. Or in this case, that helpless little thing you’re stalking. For your consideration: one young woman, one ATM withdrawal, and one really, really bad day for a robber.
Other criminals: beware. Stealing isn’t nice, and in the wrong circumstances being impolite could just cost you your life.
First off: shout out to all the fans who’ve been with us from the beginning. Seems some of you have been around for quite some time…
Lots of you have been asking about my new life as a vampire. Understandable, I would’ve asked the same when I was still among the breathing. But honestly, folks, this isn’t about me. It’s about us. This strange new ball of rock just getting used to the idea that humans and vampires are sharing real estate.
Course, we vampires have known this all along, so really the odds are a bit stacked, but don’t worry, we’ll wait for you to catch up. In the meanwhile, some of you have jumped at the opportunity to profit from us, while others have unfortunately learned your old ways just don’t jive with the new order. There’ll be more bumps in the road, to be sure, but hey, isn’t that part of the fun?
Perhaps I’m just feeling optimistic today. I’ve recently received an exciting bit of news, further proof of the progress vampires have made in becoming an accepted part of the mainstream.
But more on that later.