Recap: "True Blood" Episode 2, Season 2 from LA Times

Things start right where they left off, with Eric drenched in the blood of the hick he has just torn to pieces. He turns furiously to a completely freaked-out Lafayette and demands to know if there is blood in his hair (Pam was highlighting it and it still has foil in it). Yeah, Eric, it's kind of a bad hair day, um, night, for you.

Back at Bill's mossy mansion, he and Sookie lie in bed and talk about the challenges that newbie vamp Jessica presents. They are just too cute in the afterglow of their make-up sex. (And in living rooms across America, women sigh, perhaps with dismay, over Stephen Moyer's chest-wax job.) In regard to Jessica, Bill laments that she has no humanity, is in the grips of overwhelming transformations and cannot control her impulses.

"So how is that different from being a teenage girl?" asks Sookie. Dad joke! Nice one, Sook.

Meanwhile, at Fangtasia, Pam looks at Eric's hair and frets, "This is a disaster. We'll have to go much shorter than we planned." Thank God, Eric's long hair is so last century. The pair are quizzing Lafayette about the gay vampire Eddie whom he used to have sex with in exchange for the V that he sold illegally to thrill seekers (I imagine drinking V makes you feel as though you've unscrewed your skull and poured a satchel of pure MDMA directly onto your brain). Lafayette says he thinks Jason kidnapped Eddie.

The answer doesn't satisfy Eric and it's back to the dungeon for Lafayette and on to another plot line for us. Jason is on a silly school bus on his way to leadership camp. He meets an earnest but creepy former high school football player named Luke McDonald who swiftly becomes his bunk make and arch-nemesis.

Back at Mary Ann's house of endless fruit and weed, Tara tries to uncover Eggs' secrets. He is forthcoming: He has done time for dealing and using drugs, he's broke, and when Mary Ann found him he was living under a bridge. Yay, a winner! But none of that matters because Eggs has pecs that could crush skulls and abs that a girl could grate cheese on.

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